Twisted.

Psycho Strings

Sombre, macabre, eerie, disturbing.

No matter how I tried to shake it, something was off today. Nothing felt ordinary, though much of it was. But everything felt intense and bone-chilling. I think it's chemical, because I used to get like that a lot when I was a child. 

Come to think of it, my early memories are a little skewed. Some are foggy, some are vivid, and some are dormant and (selectively, perhaps) forgotten for years until a certain sight, sound, smell, or touch brings them to life. They're also not to be trusted, because the line between my childhood memory and my childhood dream isn't very well-defined.

In any case, I would equate the atmosphere surrounding today's events with the iconic string horror theme made famous in Psycho. As I ran into an old friend whom I last spoke to the day before she was torn away from under her bed by CAS, I felt as though doom lurked nearby. When I walked the stairs that lead to Jenny's, I felt the need to look over my shoulder several times because the echo made by the steps put me in a really uncomfortable state. Everything, coupled with my mindset, seemed to have a strikingly violent, angry and frightening nature, especially my encounters. Given my state, you can imagine my emotional reaction to a chat with an acquaintance whose sanity up and left a while back. As he spoke to me about the number of conspiracies he was allegedly the target of, his choice of employment as determined by the uniform colour, and the negative social consequences of not using the right hand movements while returning someone's lighter after borrowing it, his paranoia only fed my eerie tension.

I felt a lot better when I got home, ate, and experienced a sudden rush of energy. It couldn't have come at a better time. It served me well in keeping a poised disposition with my parents. It's one thing keeping the rest of the world in the dark regarding my sanity issues. But it's imperative that my mum doesn't worry about me right now. She's got loads on her plate already.

My Friday night should have been more exciting. It's pretty bad when the sound of my cellular ringing was aggravating me because it was getting in the way of my playing Homefront. But getting to blow people up with the touch of a button was exactly what I needed. It would have been a really bad night to go out anyway, given my short mental fuse. Time for bed, Toronto tomorrow.